The tragedy in Uvalde and others since then have led to an urgent search for answers. We seek to understand what led to these horrific acts. We ask what we personally can do to help prevent such tragedies from recurring.
As early childhood professionals, my colleagues and I are focused on children’s first five years. While we can’t presume that a disengaged childhood always leads to a violent adolescence or adulthood, we can set kids on the most likely path to success with a few strategies.
Research from Harvard University’s Center on the Developing Child documents the importance of positive “serve and return interactions” between children and adults, the absence of which leads to a child’s brain not forming as expected, which can lead to learning and behavior differences lasting into adulthood. Ample supporting research on attachment theory shows that young children with strong emotional connections or attachments to parents or caregivers are better equipped to cope with the world.
Established in 1901 as Texas’ first early childhood provider, ChildCareGroup puts this science into practice daily. We build warm, empathic relationships in the critical first few years of our students’ lives, ensuring each child feels uniquely cared for and loved and that they have strong social-emotional skills, like resilience and self-regulation. As Graciella, a four-year-old at ChildCareGroup, recently shared, “My teacher Ms. Jones taught me how to say sorry. She is so smart.”
Every adult plays a critical role in raising emotionally healthy, intellectually strong young children within a holistic, “Two Generation Approach” that supports the whole family.
No child wants to be “bad” so we need to set them up for success with all available resources. Here are ways any parent, aunt, uncle, neighbor, teacher, boss, coach can help now.
Build emotional health and self-regulation skills
Parents or caregivers can create a “Calm Down Corner” outfitted with items to cuddle, sensory items, and books in a comfortable setting. Let children know they can go there at any time to relax or settle and stay as long as needed. This is always child-led and never adult-directed.
Practice breathing exercises routinely during the day when emotions are high or when working through stressful situations.
Make simple puppets, charts, or flashcards small children can use to show how they feel if they do not have the vocabulary to express their emotions.
When conflict does arrive, model how to handle the situation. Bring up similar situations in the following days and let the child “practice” the best way to manage emotions and articulate feelings associated with the conflict that leads to resolution.
Create and follow a predictable schedule every day to give little ones a sense of security and stability. In our classrooms children eat a hot, healthy meal together, play outdoors, enjoy a healthy snack, and have a long nap every day, in addition to group and self-directed learning.
Know when to get extra help
Parents, when looking for a school for your child, seek out programs with strong mental health, counseling, and inclusivity programs that serve the needs of the whole child with diagnostic checks embedded in the school culture and wraparound services readily available for the whole family. As you interview schools, ask how they support struggling children and look for answers that show proactive, inclusive, individualized plans that address children’s emotional development, including knowing when to pull in outside professional help or resources for the child and family. The goal is for children and families to thrive together.
What employers can do
Demonstrating care for each employee and their children is important for overall productivity. If a parent is struggling with a child’s needs, provide flexibility so the parent can address those needs.
All of us — parents, caregivers, employers — can and must work together, right now, to provide appropriate interventions for our young children, while their brains are developing, and their sense of security and belonging have not been compromised. We can’t afford to wait. Let’s start today, by focusing together on our children, our future.
Tori Mannes is president and chief executive of ChildCareGroup in Dallas. She wrote this for The Dallas Morning News.
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